Hostess refuses to cover her coworker's shift on Valentine's Day, so she can spend it with her boyfriend: 'My managers all made it abundantly clear that nobody was allowed to request the day off.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Feb 19, 2026 8:00 PM EST

She was right not to cover her shift. 

When you're working in the service industry, you seldom get to choose your shifts. Schedules come out a couple of weeks ahead of time if you're lucky, giving you very little time to make any plans in advance. But there are times when you know you're going to be working, even when you really don't want to be. If you work at a brunch place, you know you're going to be working extra hard on Easter, and probably won't get to enjoy the morning and afternoon with your family. If you work at Target, you know that Christmas Eve is going to be a zoo, and you won't get home in time to tuck the kids in. If you work in an office and you don't get Columbus Day off, that might be mildly irritating, but it's nothing when compared to the craziness service workers have to deal with during their peak holiday seasons. At least most office workers get Christmas Eve and Christmas off! 

If you work in an industry that requires work on major holidays, you need to plan well in advance if you want to take those days off. I'm talking like a year in advance. If you can get the okay from your boss far before these holidays are even a thought in their mind, you might manage to take them off. But even if you do, your manager might just pretend like they don't remember that agreement and schedule you anyway. That's why it's always important to get things in writing. 

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  • A woman in a white shirt and black skirt
    via Chermiti Mohamed

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The hostess in this story had last Saturday off, so she could celebrate Valentine's Day with her boyfriend. Her coworker did not have the same luxury and practically begged her to take over her shift. 

  • Am I the bad guy for not taking my coworkers shift even though she begged me to?

    I (19f) work in a restaurant. this past Saturday was valentine's day. my managers all made it abundantly clear that nobody was allowed to request the day off.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • I got extremely lucky and wasn't scheduled for that day because Saturday is outside of my scheduling availability.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • i was so excited to be able to just spend the day with my boyfriend but then around like maybe 2:00 my coworker calls me begging to take her shift.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • i told her no and that i have plans with my boyfriend she kept begging and i kept saying no.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • she told me she called our job to tell them she wasn't coming in and they told her if she can find someone to cover it then whatever but the shift was still her responsibility and if it doesn't get covered properly then there would be consequences.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • she kept begging and begging i kept saying no and suggesting to her to ask a few other co workers who i know are single but nobody wanted to take it.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • she then got mad at me saying i don't care about her and that her and her boyfriend got in a fight so she needs to stay home with him.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • Unhappy couple not talking to one another
    via Curated Lifestyle (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • then she switched up the story saying she was already out of town and that there's no way she can get back in time.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • Couple swinging under a coconut tree during the daytime
    via Muhammadh Saamy

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • i didn't say any of this but in my head i was thinking why are you going to a whole different state knowing you have work in 2 hours she then told me that if she gets fired it's gonna be my fault and that she's not gonna be able to afford to take care of her cat.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • i honestly couldn't help but just laugh because i was in utter disbelief that she was gonna blame me for the consequences of her own actions.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • i was telling my MIL about it and she said that i could've jus taken the shift so she doesn't get fired and that got me thinking of whether i'm the AH or not.
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • LiveNeedleworker7717 NTA. But next time don't answer the phone on your day off unless you want to pick up some extra shifts.
    via u/LiveNeedleworker7717
  • izzgrizz21 Original Poster's Reply i usually don't but she had called me and she's never called me before so i answered in case maybe she had an emergency or something and needed help. we've also hung out a handful of times outside of work so i thought maybe she wanted to smoke or something
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • ladygrndr In many service jobs with weekly scheduling, the shift manager will tell the employee to find their own replacement. Quite likely this employee already burned through their good will with literally everyone else, or everyone else was already scheduled. If I was still a server, I would rather work Valentines and take another day to celebrate it with my partner because it can be a very profitable night, but to each their own.
    via u/ladygrndr
  • izzgrizz21 Original Poster's Reply if i was a server i absolutely would've taken it for the money, but im only a host and unfortunately we don't get tipped out from the servers like most other restaurants. but to go in on my day off to nothing but absolute chaos while making minimum wage was something i wasn't about to do
    via u/izzgrizz21
  • Hot_Laugh8061 Um no. Hard NTA on this one. Sounds like your coworker has a lying and guilt tripping problem for sure. She can suffer the consequences of Her own actions. I hope you enjoyed your time with your man. Also, you MIL sounds like a keep the peace type person, exhausting...
    via u/Hot_Laugh8061
  • nightraven3141592 Don't your MIL like you? Suggesting that you go to work instead of spending time with her son? Your colleague's inability to plan is not your emergency. Actions have consequences, and it's not your job to fix them.
    via u/nightraven3141592
  • thesheeplookup NTA. You had plans, sounds like she was stressed and handling it badly. This was not a medical crisis situation where her BF was rushed to hospital following a heart attack, or her kid had been hit by a car, and she needed help. She had a fight with her honey and was understandably stressed about it, but it's not your problem to solve.
    via u/thesheeplookup
  • Gemfyre1 Nope not your problem. "Needs to stay home" went to "out of state" real quick. Expect her to have told your work you agreed to take the shift, lying comes real easy to that one. Manipulating little sh.
    via u/Gemfyre1
  • bbw4me1234 Nta your co worker is a manipulative idiot!
    via u/bbw4me1234
  • SparrowHawk529 NTA. This is what you should do going forward: On days that you are not scheduled and you have plans, like valentine's, dont respond to any texts requesting you cover shifts. On days you're not scheduled and don't have plans, sure, if you're feeling. generous. But you shouldn't have gotten into the please/no cycle in the first place.
    via u/SparrowHawk529
  • MICH1AM NTA She had the problem. It was Not your problem. Don't let it bother you one bit, because if it were you asking for her to take your shift, She wouldn't care one bit!
    via u/MICH1AM

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boyfriend schedule shift manager laugh restaurant Travel waitress coworker Valentines day
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